[Verse]
He was a fine upstanding bantam ,
So brisk and stiff and spry,
With springy step and jaunty plume
And a purposeful look in his eye,
In his little black laughing eye,
[Verse]
I took him to the coop and introduced him
To my seventeen wide-eyed hens.
He tupped and he tupped as a hero tups
And he bowed to them all, and then
He upped and he tupped em all again, he did.
[Verse]
And then upon the peace of me ducks and me geese
He boldly did intrude.
With glazed eyes and open mouths
They bore it all with fortitude
And a little bit of gratitude, they did.
[Verse]
He jumped my giggling guinea fowl
He thrust his attentions upon
My twenty hysterical turkeys and
A visiting migrant swan.
But the bantam thundered on, he did.
[Verse]
He groped me fan-tailed pigeons and
Me lily-white columbine,
And as I was locking up the budgerigar
He jumped my parrot from behind;
Who was sitting on me shoulder at the time.
[Verse]
But all of a sudden with a gasp and a gulp
He clapped his hands to his head,
Fell flat on his back with his feet in the air.
My bantam lay dead
And the vultures circled overhead.
[Verse]
What a noble beast; what a champion ;
What a way to live and to die.
I was diggin him a grave to protect his bones
From the hungry buzzards in the sky
When the bantam opened up a sly little eye.
[Verse]
He gave me a wink and a terrible grin
The way that rapists do.
He said, You see them silly daft buggers up there?
They ll be down in a minute or two;
They ll be down in a minute or two.